It really is easier to be…

Happy Sunday Morning! I’m supposed to be getting ready for church, and I will, but I just wanted to say a quick hello. I have a busy day planned, and I am so excited to be meeting with my best friend from NC and seeing a movie together. I miss the everydayness of our friendship, and thoroughly appreciate the willingness he shows to meet in the middle and work on keeping our friendship alive. Relationships take work, and care, and patience. When you stop tending them, they’ll die. It’s easier to nurture the relationships that matter to you, even if you feel like the thorns of discontent are poking into your heart at every turn.

It really is easier to be kind. I am a firm believer in kindness, and I try hard to practice it every day. Of course I fail, we all do, but I keep getting up and trying to be kind. I don’t like the way I feel when I am treated as less than, why would I want anyone else to feel that way? Sometimes kindness can take on a mantle that looks and sounds like cruelness from the outside, so if you are prone to jumping to conclusions, or judging, I hope you take some time to understand the situation and persons whom you judge. There is concern shown when somone restrains themselves from lashing out in anger, and that concern is kindness displayed.

It really is easier to be quiet. Just because someone is quiet doesn’t mean they don’t care. Perhaps they feel wounded and need to heal. Perhaps they have something difficult to say and they’re trying to work out how to say the very thing they need to without hurting someone else. Maybe, just maybe, the quiet ones know that what they will say IS going to hurt someone else and they are trying to find a way to minimize pain. Being quiet is not being mean, no matter how others perceive your silence. Staying silent can hurt both yourself and others, but silence is necessary at times.

It really is easier to be forgiving. I love that I have a forgiving nature and can forgive even the most heinous of actions against me and those I love. Forgiving doesn’t mean you forget, it means you realize that someone else has done, said or been something else that you have been hurt by and you choose to be free of the burdens cast upon you by them. Forgiveness is freedom, and freedom is necessary for you to be able to move forward through your life. I forgive the people that have hurt me because holding on to pain, resentment and cruel actions just hurts me, not them. I forgive myself for hurting my beloved family, for hurting strangers with a cross word and for not always making the best decisions. Forgiveness is not a religious moral, it’s a human one, and human beings deserve to be forgiven.

It really is easier to be accountable for yourself. Living authentically is hard enough, and blaming someone else for your unhappiness is the coward’s way out. I am not always happy, but I am responsible for myself and work at seeking joy. I made a rather costly mistake at work this week and didn’t want to own up to it, but I did, and I am. I am also determined to learn from it. Accountability is hard, but as time moves on, it becomes second nature to me. I admit that I have a lot to learn about life still, and I am looking forward to learning more about what makes me, me. I have been defined by events cast upon me by another’s actions, changed to my very core, but I am responsible for how and what I learn from such events. I choose, not someone else, to be who I am and who I become.

It really is easier to build someone up instead of tearing them down. I am very guilty of tearing and shredding my husband’s heart apart, and I am responsible for the rebuilding of the same. Just as he is with me. We are partners in this life by choice, and by decision. Simple, yet beyond complicated. In a world where committment means pretty much nothing anymore, we commit to one another every single day. I cannot imagine my life being spent with a different person, my husband is my person. He is a solid, loyal and fiercely protective man, but he is also giving, patient and loving. I can’t fathom someone else being the Poppy to our grands, it just wouldn’t work. People still choose love, they choose committment, and they choose to work things out. I am ever thankful that the man I have been married to for 37+ years is still my person.

Since I have to go and get ready for the rest of the day, I’ll end here and wish you all the very best of Sunday’s. Live authentically, love yourself and others, and above be kind. Your kindness just may change someone’s life in ways you can’t begin to imagine…

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